Ay dios mio, it’s been a long time since a Netflix film annoyed the living shit out me with how blatantly lazy and unfulfilling it is. Hidden Strike and Heart Of Stone might be more fitting of those terms but “The Monkey King” had more potential based on its subject matter and the end result doesn’t meet, let alone match the grandiose quality and entertainment the tale and its dozen other iterations set forth.
Getting the guy who directed The Boxtrolls and OPEN SEASON to helm this one seems like a harmless one at first (and it definitely is) but Anthony Stacchi’s brash direction still does not fit. Not only flagrantly safe but flippantly uneven, it hardly felt like a cohesive linear process of motion; somehow ostentatious and drab and wearisome all at once.
For every “well-timed” joke, there’s about 20 to 25 dated stinkers that blow in afterward. For every admittedly decent vocal performance, there are about two around the corner that lack personality. For every well choreographed action scene with wonderfully implemented lighting, the rest is substandard. Its cinematography and editing are far from inane but are nothing to write home about and yet, the way the movie looks is remarkable in its uses of light and shadow and how its painted brushstroke aesthetic resembles that of an authentic Chinese animated flick. Presentation wise, it certainly displays a level of vibrancy that would be fitting of a story boasting Eastern animation but it lacks distinctive visual flair to truly bring the world to life and unlike other Netflix films like Over The Moon, Mitchell’s Vs Machines, Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio or even Nimona, the animation does next to nothing to enhance what little is presented as a story and in some ways, actively worsens the quality of what it shows.
Yeah, I think that’s the biggest issue preventing this movie from being even a TAD bit enjoyable: this iteration feels like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. It gives off the impression that it has scope and style to spare but between its episodic structure, belated emotional beats that are tacked on and unearned and the chances they had to incorporate Chinese mythology and folk religion as well as Taoist and Buddhist theology into it in the short amount of time they were given and just didn’t take it, it leaves a bittersweet and rather metallic aftertaste in my mouth. There is no shame in how Americanized and homogenized they made this legend’s tale and everything between it comes off noisy and insufferable, especially considering the fact that every character in this movie is either passable, bland or just plain annoying, including the Monkey King himself. Sure, I’m aware that the character is supposed to embody the immature nature of a prolonged adolescent scoundrel who can somewhat back it up; it makes thematic sense that way to have him be kinda insufferable from the start. Unfortunately, that’s his only one defining character trait here; the lack of any other likable qualities quickly morphs him into an insufferable TOOL.
KUZCO is a bigger asshat than him and yet even he was given time and care to improve.
That’s also why I think the pacing is problematic for me. Sure, it doesn’t waste anytime setting up the stakes and what’s happening but even putting aside the notion that I accept this being somewhat of a prequel to the actual story, its breakneck speed puts the entire narrative more on autopilot than it already was. Clocking the film in at 96 minutes doesn’t give the story ANY time at all to develop anything or follow through on what the story DOES set up and the lack of sufficient breathing room cripples any attempt at an actual plot structure and thus, renders the films attempts at worldbuilding bare and deadweight.
On top of that, this film probably has the most lifeless and barren production design out of everything I’ve seen this year, none of the music is the closest thing to memorable, every damn piece of dialogue felt yanked out from a random number generator and the damn thing can’t even keep its own mean-spirited tone to save its life.
Nearly everything about this film feels like it was made with a corporate checklist but between it’s stock, bland, inoffensive, bran-flake nature, and sticking it with an annoying dipshit of a main character, I’ve never had this much trouble writing a review in a while. This felt deliberately designed to annoy me.
