In this Hunger Games spoof, Kantmiss Evershot must fight for her life in the 75th annual Starving Games, where she could also win an old ham, a coupon for a foot-long sub, and a partially eaten pic...
The Starving Games left me hungry for some quality film-making. Oh boy. This was something else. No longer are we experiencing the tolerability of ‘Date Movie’. ‘Meet The Spartans’ now an echoing far cry for assistance. Stranded, isolated, and alone. Friedberg and Seltzer have somehow managed to accomplish the impossible, bettering their previous efforts in creating one of the worst possible parody features available. This is undoubtedly down there, burning in the hellish fires of Hollywood’s underworld with ‘Movie 43’ and their own ironically titled ‘Disaster Movie’. Solely spoofing ‘The Hunger Games’, this parody was instantly exhausted of ideas right from the very first second. Kantmiss Evershot? Was that supposed to be funny? No, seriously. Did I miss something whilst I gleefully bleached my eyes?
This time around, the directors seemingly gave up trying to be hilarious and instead insisted on presenting as many advertisements as possible. Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, Starbucks, Subway, Apple, McDonalds, Nike and a plethora of other brands. Atleast their previous parodies actually attempted to mock films (it’s a back-handed compliment...) and not feed into corporate monopolisation. Then there’s the outdated pop culture icons that were ham-fisted into this grotesque rectum of a film. The Annoying Orange, PSY and LMFAO to name a few. Playing on nostalgia isn’t funny. It’s death-worthy. The Starving Games wasn’t in first gear to begin with. Heck, it wasn’t even in neutral. It was reversing! The film was laughing at me for watching it in the first place!
Peter is a device for an elongated homosexual joke, an unhealthy obsession that the directors have had in all their features. Sexual crudeness was included to, yet again, satisfy all those lonesome virgins “fapping” to their TV whenever Kantmiss repeatedly forces a teen to “motorboat” her. Looping scenes by masquerading them as highlights, from shoving a foot up someone’s poop chute to a guy battered by a cannonball and exclaiming “my balls!” in slow-motion, functioning as a minor lethargic effort to ensue laughter. Then, the real kicker, the final five minutes of the runtime comprised of a blooper reel! As if the film itself actually wasn’t funny, they thought the outtakes would surely inject some hilarity! Yeah, no. Tears were certainly visible. Tears of regret. Technically speaking, there are no positives. Acting? Terrible. Visual effects? Borderline obnoxious. Directing? Wait, there’s direction? Costumes and makeup? Cosplayers.
To sum up this travesty in one sentence: The Starving Games is a bunch of blindingly white-teethed attractive models running around in their overgrown back garden, attempting to parody ‘The Hunger Games’, but instead obliterated their careers before they had even manifested. There. Done! Move along...
