White Chicks (2004)

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  TheMovieDiorama

  5 / 10

  White Chicks is the equivalent of devouring fattening foods. You know you shouldn't, but it's just too damn good to shout "No! Objection!". Much like with my 'Transporter 2' review, there are films I acknowledge as bad. I know in my head that this film is terribly atrocious. Racist, misogynistic, homophobic, sexist...every bad connotation that target social demographics. Yet...somewhere deep inside the abyss that is my soul...I just love watching this comedy. Two black undercover agents must disguise themselves as two white rich sisters. Sure, there's a crime story involving a drug bust and kidnapping, but me and you both know that we don't care for that. Don't even pretend that you wanted an engrossing story, the premise itself is obscenely stupid on all levels. No no, what you wanted was onscreen idiocy and uncomfortableness from the Wayans brothers as they dress up terribly, shoddily act and look scarily bizarre, as white chicks. It's stupid beyond all measures. So weird that we need to invent an entirely new scale in an attempt to calculate the immeasurable surrealism of White Chicks. White. Chicks. Chicks White. Chicks are white, right? White Chickens! I don't laugh at comedies, you all know that, but this film has me in fits of laughter every time. Possibly the most quotable comedic screenplay of all time, I mean that. "What a beautiful chocolate man!", "Ohhh you want to talk about mothers!" and giving a new surge of life to Vanessa Carlton's 'A Thousand Miles'. Terry Crews is life, White Chicks is life, but Terry Crews in White Chicks? Double life powerrrr! He's flipping hilarious! I can't even. Jennifer Carpenter was surprisingly great as well. "Somebody throw Shamu back in the ocean!" Ha Ha Haaaa! I'm done. I realise that I'm probably still drunk from this weekend which was just as hilarious as this comedy. Stupid, basic execution and rather offensive, but ummm "ex-squeeze me!" I don't care. Funnily terrible is the best way to describe White Chicks, wait does that even make sense? I don't even know anymore, I just want my sequel...

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