Hitman (2007)

User Review

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  TheMovieDiorama

  4 / 10

  Hitman nearly assassinates its source material through a mundane plot. Let me go on record by saying this is not the worst video game adaptation out there. It's not. Have you seen Uwe Boll's films? I would go as far as saying I do not hate this film. Does that necessarily make it a good film? Not in the slightest. It often feels like having a laser pointer tracking you for ninety minutes in the hope that the sniper will splatter your brains whenever Kurylenko (typecast as a "mistress") opens her mouth. However director Gens does get a few things right. An engineered assassin simply referred to as Agent 47 is caught up in a political conspiracy involving a "cat and mouse" chase with other agencies.
  
  The main aspect that works perfectly is the casting of Olyphant. An incredibly underrated actor who physically embodies the professionalism of the video game anti-hero. Straight posture, mostly silent and showing off that glossy bald head that blind my eyes when light reflects off of it. Sure, the dialogue he is given is absolute trash and the forced romantic endeavours the plot so wants to have tarnishes the overall character, but Olyphant was great. The same cannot be said for the rest of the cast however. The story itself is pretty much incomprehensibly dull, involving a body double who I'm sure used a "face mask machine" from 'Mission: Impossible' and Interpol and FSB wanting Agent 47 for some reason. Double-crosses, narrow escapes and a severe lack of meticulously staged assassinations that the game perfected. Incoherently generic.
  
  The violence, whilst excessive, certainly provides limited entertainment, especially when Agent 47 massacres an entire lavish apartment with two sub-machine guns. It shows that he is willing to do anything to eliminate the target, which stays true to the source material. Oh, and he changes clothes occasionally to pull off disguises. Bonus! Aside from that though, it's a wearisome experience that, whilst not the worst video game adaptation thanks to Olyphant's committed performance, will most likely be forgotten about the next day. Yup...already forgotten.

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