The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

User Review

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  TheMovieDiorama

  3 / 10

  The Hills Have Eyes 2 cannot overcome the mountainous clichés that made me gouge my own eyes out. The remake, whilst not particularly great, was tolerable and did showcase some excellent use of horror by perpetuating gore and strong sexual threat. This sequel does uphold the latter elements, albeit cheaply, but still greatly pales in comparison. After the events of its predecessor, a squad of national guard members are tasked in investigating the disappearance of scientists in Sector 16. A testing facility for atomic bombs, so you know what that means...! Mutants residing in caverns looking for female women to rape and increase the population of the grotesque abnormalities that are hidden from society. Nothing else to it to be honest. Some scenes of body gore, including fingering a cranium to pull out brains or a survivor hiding in a toilet (literally in it), were well executed and forced me to twitch with anguish. Excessive? Perhaps, but entertainingly horrible nonetheless. Unfortunately, the characters are dumb. They might be rookies, but 12-year olds have more common sense and intelligence that this entire unit. "They're picking us off one by one!" as they continue to split up and coincidentally get slaughtered. "Calm down, you'll get us killed!" as they haphazardly shout everything whilst slamming on metal blast doors, coincidentally alerting all the nearby mutants. "You killed my baby!" screams a woman from a terrorising family as the clueless trainee soldier approaches the individual who coincidentally has grenades strapped to her. You get my point. It's incredibly stupid. An expendable cast with no personality and zero memorability. Choppy editing with minimal direction. Less than ninety minutes long and still felt like it dragged, particularly the forgettable second act. And it ends with a scene of a soldier smashing a mutant's groin with a sledgehammer. Need I say more? It's cheap, disposable and derivative. Just stick with the original and remake.

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